tenderhearted

ByManika Ajmani

mango seeds taught me devotion

humid summers, the evening call to prayer,

my fingers sticky, the backs of my teeth alive and wanting

when all i cared about were immediate answers to my restless questions

 

i told sweeter stories then

pulp dripping down my throat slowly

tongue coated in sugar, my smile wider

hairs stuck in my molars and the sun laughing at the gleam in my eye

 

but none of it prepared me

for the soft touch of a hand longing for your own

and the charged silence of holding your breath

and listening for someone else’s

 

it’s a cruel dance we play with each other

i go to bed every night convinced i am wrong

that i will wake up alone with my back on the grass, my head still stuck in the clouds

and nectar a forgotten stain on my chin

 

the childhood restlessness relents

i savor these moments like sparse breezes in the still heat

and under a sky empty with possibility

i learn what it means to ache

Manika Ajmani is a senior majoring in International Relations with minors in Journalism and Forensics & Criminality. They like to live, laugh, love, and have been writing for as long as they can remember.

You can follow Manika on Instagram here.