{"id":3912,"date":"2021-12-01T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2021-12-01T08:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/dornsife.usc.edu\/palaver\/?p=3912"},"modified":"2023-06-28T17:54:43","modified_gmt":"2023-06-29T00:54:43","slug":"mothers-life-and-other-chores","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dornsife.usc.edu\/palaver\/fall-2021\/mothers-life-and-other-chores\/","title":{"rendered":"Mothers, Life, and Other Chores"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\n\n\n\n \n \n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
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Mothers, Life, and Other Chores<\/h1>\n\n\n<\/div>\n \n \n By<\/span>Lauryn Jones<\/strong>\n \n December 1, 2021<\/span>\n <\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n <\/div><\/div>\n\n \n \n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n
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Editorial Content Warning: T<\/em>his poem contains language around suicide and police brutality.<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Sometimes waking up in the morning feels like a chore.<\/p>\n

The soft earth surrounding me has always felt more appealing than<\/p>\n

how my mother used to tuck me in at night, with a<\/p>\n

heavy sigh, heavy heart, taking the weight off her shoulders,<\/p>\n

and placing it onto mine.<\/p>\n

Black women are always bearing bad news, and children<\/p>\n

that are murdered in the street.<\/p>\n

I feel like I am underwater.<\/p>\n

Each breath burns and stings as the saltwater<\/p>\n

casually drifts me away<\/p>\n

with plastic cups, empty beer bottles,<\/p>\n

and whatever other trash that was produced<\/p>\n

at last night\u2019s beach party that the<\/p>\n

cool breeze whisked away just enough that the partygoers<\/p>\n

missed it during cleanup.<\/p>\n

Perhaps that is God\u2019s heavy sigh. The destruction,<\/p>\n

the sickness, the poverty, the emptiness.<\/p>\n

It is him just trying to take the weight of the world<\/p>\n

off his shoulders to create new ones.<\/p>\n

I have too much on my plate.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ve been hungry on and off since I was 14.<\/p>\n

I restrict plenty of things in my life that I need to survive.<\/p>\n

I have been told by medical professionals that<\/p>\n

I make terribly toxic choices.<\/p>\n

My mother was told by a medical professional<\/p>\n

that she couldn\u2019t have children<\/p>\n

and look at her now.<\/p>\n

Two kids born, neither shot in the street\u2014<\/p>\n

she must be doing something right.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Mom, what would you do<\/em><\/p>\n

if I killed myself?<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

I would be so angry. I sacrificed so much for you,<\/em><\/p>\n

I do so much for you, and you would do this to me?<\/em><\/p>\n

To me?<\/em><\/p>\n

I\u2019m not sure if I would even give you a funeral.<\/em><\/p>\n

I have borne the heavy weight of being<\/p>\n

for as long as I can remember.<\/p>\n

(My memory, however, is spotty).<\/p>\n

Medical professionals say it is the trauma.<\/p>\n

So perhaps it is not the weight, but the trauma of being.<\/p>\n

When the sound of my own breath, the tempo of my heartbeat<\/p>\n

is no longer music enough to get me through the night.<\/p>\n

Yet every morning I reluctantly rise,<\/p>\n

With a heavy sigh.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n <\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n\n \n \n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

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Lauryn Jones<\/strong> is a senior English literature major and a songwriting minor. Lauryn has been writing stories for as long as she can remember and has been performing spoken word poetry since the seventh grade. If you see her around she\u2019ll most likely be writing. If not, she\u2019ll be stressing about her inability to write. Or she\u2019s on Twitter<\/a> or Instagram<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n <\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n\n \n \n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n

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\n\n \n \n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n <\/div><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":288,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[45],"tags":[51],"class_list":["post-3912","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-fall-2021","tag-poetry"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nMothers, Life, and Other Chores<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/dornsife.usc.edu\/palaver\/fall-2021\/mothers-life-and-other-chores\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Mothers, Life, and Other Chores - Palaver Arts Magazine\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/dornsife.usc.edu\/palaver\/fall-2021\/mothers-life-and-other-chores\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Palaver Arts Magazine\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/palaver.arts.magazine\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2021-12-01T08:00:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2023-06-29T00:54:43+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/dornsife.usc.edu\/palaver\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/175\/2023\/06\/palaver-logo.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"710\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"198\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"akcannon\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dornsife.usc.edu\/palaver\/fall-2021\/mothers-life-and-other-chores\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dornsife.usc.edu\/palaver\/fall-2021\/mothers-life-and-other-chores\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"akcannon\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/live-usc-dornsife.pantheonsite.io\/palaver\/#\/schema\/person\/8ac801b3c8176b6860207b43ecbe9e78\"},\"headline\":\"Mothers, Life, and Other Chores\",\"datePublished\":\"2021-12-01T08:00:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2023-06-29T00:54:43+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dornsife.usc.edu\/palaver\/fall-2021\/mothers-life-and-other-chores\/\"},\"wordCount\":5,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/live-usc-dornsife.pantheonsite.io\/palaver\/#organization\"},\"keywords\":[\"Poetry\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Issue 10: Fall 2021\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/dornsife.usc.edu\/palaver\/fall-2021\/mothers-life-and-other-chores\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/dornsife.usc.edu\/palaver\/fall-2021\/mothers-life-and-other-chores\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/dornsife.usc.edu\/palaver\/fall-2021\/mothers-life-and-other-chores\/\",\"name\":\"Mothers, Life, and Other Chores - 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